Thursday, October 6, 2011

Realer than that

Don't call it emotional wreck. It sounds so... pathetic.

My heart beats on. I am pulsing, throbbing, living, breathing. 
It is possible to be all those and be broken too. 
And you don't have to be ashamed of your brokenness. 
It's okay to be in a place where all feels insecure and sad. 
Life does that to you. 
And you can maybe choose to ignore and not face up to it, but in the end, 
when you choose to cry tonight, that will make it better. 
He will hold you close. 
He always does.

We don't need to label it as emotional instability. 
It is, 
in the end, 
realer than that. 
This is He, inside you, and the pain and fullness and excitement and joy and 
throb and ache synchronizes to the beat of His heart, so in love with yours. 
Love so much more than you have known. 
Love hurts, you know. 
True love will always hurt, 
in the very sweetest, 
most heart-breaking of ways.

But I am not always ready for the breaking. 
It comes so slowly, so gradually, 
yet so unexpectedly. 
I'm left reeling in the pain. 

Sometimes it's when I'm reeling that I can most clearly see the stars of you.